Shadow of Subconsciousness

Monday, 17 April 2017

Disguise everything


Lately I've felt mentally drained.

I see weird dreams. I feel like I keep disappointing people; time passes by and I cough up that I want to keep my independence. Things end up eating me from the inside. I feel like in reality my identity as a whole takes huge space no matter do I want it or not. I need to feel like I exist completely, or I want to be left alone. I wish people would do their research instead of automatically putting me under an examination. I wish people would sincerely believe me, when I say something doesn't work with me as they tend think by default. I still don't understand prying, and I think I never will. Eventually I find myself in the corner of the bed, with a burning head and a hurting heart, while I cry my lungs out, until we both just fall asleep.

Sometimes I feel so many colors at once that the colors lose their meaning.

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